Dress explosions


My boo got married on Saturday! YAY! Well, yay for her! I did have an excellent time and I almost fell apart and cried like a baby who has to fart and does not quite know how to do it (you have to be a parent to probably understand that). The day started out pretty normal. I got up, slowly “pre-curled” my hair and headed out to the church where we were all going to get ready together.

We had plenty of time. It was 1:00pm when I arrived and we did not have to be ready for pictures until 3:00pm so I was taking my time, helping other people do their hair and make-up; chatting it up with people I just met. You know, acting like I had nothing else to do. Then around 2:00 I decide that it is time to start getting this show going by finishing my hair and make-up. Around 2:30pm the wedding coordinator comes in to announce that we need to be ready and at a different location (7 miles away) by 3:00pm. What in the batman tights did you just say? My eyeballs almost exploded. I wanted to toss that lady across the room!
You can not just change the time that women are supposed to be somewhere with 30 minutes before the time. Two of us almost went into cardiac arrest right there when she said that. I guess our reactions were highly visible because within 10 minutes it was changed back to being ready at 3:00pm at the current location. The damage was done for me though. I had already panicked and started to rush. I finished my hair and make-up and threw on my dress. I went back into the room with everyone else and sat down to do some final touch-ups on my hair and make-up when the back of my dress fell apart.


I felt like running through a window until I made it to my house and slept off this terrible nightmare but this was not a nightmare, this was real life! I then proceeded to get mostly naked in front of all 12 bridesmaids and whoever else was in the room while some of the other women tried to figure out how to fix this disaster. I should have taken a picture but was too distraught to think I would want to remember this moment. I basically ended up in the dress with no bra and safety pinned in it. I was scared to move, sit, breathe, fart… you name it.

We head downstairs for pictures while one final bridesmaid is rushing to get her dress on and is planning to meet us downstairs. When we get downstairs we realize that it is taking her quite a bit of time to get this dress on. Then we get word that her dress fell apart in the back as well. We did not want the bride to panic so we kept it from her trying to get the photographers to do other photos. When my friend did finally come down the damage to her dress was much worse than mine was. We both held it together and remained safety pinned into our outfits for the duration of the wedding and the reception. These dresses were ordered off of Etsy and made in China by a woman named Robin whose Etsy shop has since been closed… obviously the dresses were made terribly…and they were pretty expensive!


As you can see from the front it is not noticeable. It did create massive amounts of anxiety for the both of us however. We made it through the wedding and it was time to get the party started at the reception. That story in itself requires its own post. Ladies and gentlemen when I say it was a good time I am not lying. Probably the best time I have ever had at a wedding reception. Stay tuned for that fun mess tomorrow!

Loves you later!


2 thoughts on “Dress explosions

  1. u r right. this is my absolute favorite so far. the anchorman visual is the best ever bc i just sat here laughing hysterically for quite some time imagining that was you with your eyes glowing throwing someone across the room. i would pay to see that happen in real life!

    • I know right! I love GIFs so I will definitely be including more of those.. I really need to fix the spacing on this blog though. It’s bothering me like nobodies business.

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